What happens when you watch other people's children grow up and realise your child should be growing up alongside them?

In Episode 77 of The Grief Guardian Podcast, I talk about something many bereaved parents experience but may struggle to put into words.

My daughter Mia was born sleeping in October 2022. As I watch children around the age she would be now, I often find myself imagining the ordinary moments we never got to have.

Taking her to the playground. Watching her make friends. Seeing her discover animals and decide what she loves. Making pancakes together. Going to the beach. Hearing her ridiculous stories. Tucking her into bed.

And perhaps most of all, knowing what it would have felt like to have my daughter run up and hug me.

Watching other people's children grow can bring two emotions at the same time. You can feel genuine happiness watching another child experience life while also feeling the sadness of knowing your own child should be there too.

I don't look at other people's children and wish they weren't there.

I look at them and wish Mia was there too.

In this episode, I share the ordinary Saturday I wish I could have spent with my four-year-old daughter and why those seemingly insignificant moments can become some of the things we grieve the most.

I didn't need Mia to achieve anything.

I didn't need her to become anyone.

I just wanted the chance to be her dad.

If you've lost a child and watching other children grow brings up emotions you weren't expecting, you are not alone. You can smile at another child's happiness and still grieve the milestones your own child never got to experience.

Your child's life may have ended, but your love for them didn't.

You can still carry their love with you.

❤️ In loving memory of Mia Elizabeth.

If this episode speaks to you, please consider sharing it with another parent who may need to hear it.

The Grief Guardian
Guiding you through the hardest journey, life after losing a loved one. Empowering resilience, healing, and hope one step at a time.

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