🎧 Episode 11: Co-Regulation — How Calm Calms and Stress Stresses

Welcome back to All the Feels with Lauren Carlisle Brown. 💛
If you’re listening in real time, this is the first week of January 2026, and Lauren is kicking off the new year by shifting the podcast into a powerful next chapter.

The first 10 episodes were designed to lay the foundation: the philosophy, the tools, and the how of feeling—not just why feelings matter, but how to work with them in real life.
Now we’re moving from self-focused emotional skill-building into something deeply relational: co-regulation.

Co-regulation is the (often invisible) process of one person’s nervous system influencing another’s—through breath, tone, posture, eye contact, presence, touch, and even silence. It’s why someone’s steadiness can soften your body… and someone’s stress can spike your nervous system instantly.

This episode explores both sides of that dynamic:

• Co-regulation: calm calms
• Co-dysregulation: stress stresses

And most importantly, Lauren teaches how co-regulation is not just “sweet” or “supportive”—it’s biological, deeply wired into your system, and also a skill you can practice.

✨ In this episode, you’ll learn

• Why Lauren doesn’t love the term “emotional regulation” (and what she teaches instead)
• What co-regulation is and how it works beneath the surface
• The difference between co-regulation and co-dysregulation
• How your nervous system constantly asks: “Am I safe here?”
• The cues your body reads—breath, tone, posture, proximity, eye contact, touch, silence
• Why calm people can help you soften (and why dysregulated people can tighten your whole system)
• How trauma and unpredictable environments can lead to hypervigilance
• How to begin noticing who helps your system soften vs. who you brace around
• How to become a co-regulating presence without absorbing someone else’s overwhelm

🧠 Co-Regulation, Explained Simply

Co-regulation is what happens when one nervous system helps another nervous system settle.It’s the “exhale” you feel around someone steady.

It’s the way your child calms when you stay grounded.It’s why a hug, a handhold, or a quiet presence can undo you in the best way.It’s also why tension spreads fast—because your body is always reading the room and adjusting.

🌿 Reflection Practice for the Week:

As you move through this week, notice:

• Who helps your breath slow down?
• Who helps your shoulders drop?
• Who do you feel safe enough to “melt” around?
• Who do you chronically brace around?
• When are you the grounding presence in the room?

This isn’t about judgment. It’s about honoring your body’s wisdom.

Take the next step in your self-care journey:

Download The Exquisite Self-Care Handbook — Lauren’s free guide to help you slow down, regulate your nervous system, and reconnect with what truly nourishes you.

It’s the perfect companion to the work we explore here on All the Feels.

👉 Get your free copy of The Exquisite Self-Care Handbook HERE

Connect with Lauren

• Instagram: @the_emotionscoach
  

• Website: laurencarlislebrown.com

  • Freebie: The Exquisite Self-Care Handbook