Content note: This episode includes discussion of infant death

In this episode, Dr. Baron sits down with Zissel Garber, a lawyer and mother of two living daughters, for an honest conversation about the five pregnancies that shaped her family and the grief and gratitude she carries with her every day.

Zissel opens up about her first pregnancy, a molar pregnancy that grew into cancer, and the six months of chemotherapy she underwent before she could try again. In her second pregnancy, she gave birth to her daughter Bracha (blessing) at 20 weeks, and Bracha died shortly after. Zissel shares what it meant to hold her, to give her a name full of meaning, and to speak about her without apology, even when it makes others uncomfortable.

After learning she had cervical incompetence, or, as Zissel prefers to call it, "cervical insufficiency," she carried two more pregnancies filled with uncertainty, and her daughters each arrived early, bringing their own fears and hopes. With openness, she speaks about the grief that still visits her years later, on first days of school and at birthday parties, and why she sees this not as a journey with an ending, but as a path.

This episode is part of 12 Months of Compassion, IWSTHAB's year-long series of webinars and podcasts. You can find every episode and event in the series on our 12 Months of Compassion page with the month of October focusing on grief and loss.

About Zissel Garber:

Mom to 3 girls, 2 living and living in a space for both joy and grief at the same time. Trying to manage ways to honor my path to parenthood, my first born that isn't living and still very much an influence on how I parent and who I am.

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