Why Money Fights Are Destroying Your Marriage (And What to Do) | EP 79 copertina

Why Money Fights Are Destroying Your Marriage (And What to Do) | EP 79

Why Money Fights Are Destroying Your Marriage (And What to Do) | EP 79

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 💰 WHAT'S INSIDE THIS EPISODE Ever wonder why you and your partner can't seem to get on the same page about money—even when you're both "trying"? What if the real issue isn't actually about the $9 block of cheese or the expensive muffins, but about the money stories you both absorbed as children? 🎧 In This Episode: Why your childhood money beliefs are sabotaging your marriage right now—and how to identify them (04:00)The real reason couples struggle with money (hint: it's not about budgets or math) (05:00)How Julia and Gino went from struggling financially to coaching families after 27 years of marriage (06:00)Why "doing it for the kids" might actually be hurting your family (09:00)The #1 challenge every couple faces (and it's not what you think) (11:30)How to argue in front of your kids the RIGHT way—and why hiding disagreements creates emotionally dysregulated adults (20:00)The difference between fighting and healthy disagreements (21:00)Why self-compassion is your secret weapon as an overwhelmed parent (23:00) 💭 WHY THIS MATTERS TO YOU Let's be honest—money is the thing nobody wants to talk about, but it's also the thing destroying relationships and creating massive stress in your home. You came from one household with specific beliefs about money. Your partner came from a completely different household with totally different beliefs. And now you're both operating from invisible scripts you didn't even know existed. Maybe you're the person who panics when your partner buys the expensive cheese. Or maybe you're the one who doesn't understand why your partner freaks out over "small" purchases. Either way, you're both triggered by money in ways that have nothing to do with your actual bank account—and everything to do with what you learned about money before age 10. Julia and Gino Barbaro—married 27 years, homeschooling parents of SIX kids, successful real estate investors, and certified life and marriage coaches—get it. They struggled with money fights, communication breakdowns, and completely different approaches to parenting for years before figuring out what was really going on beneath the surface. This isn't about financial planning or budgets (you can breathe now). This is about financial THERAPY. This is about understanding why you feel what you feel, where those feelings came from, and how to actually communicate about money without World War III breaking out in your kitchen. But here's what makes this conversation even more valuable: Julia and Gino don't just talk about money. They talk about how your inability to communicate about money bleeds into EVERY area of your relationship—parenting, boundaries, emotional regulation, modeling behavior for your kids, and whether you're creating a home that feels peaceful or chaotic. If you've ever felt like you're doing everything "for the kids" but still feel unfulfilled, if you avoid bringing things up because you don't want to deal with your partner's reaction, or if you secretly worry your kids are absorbing your stress patterns, this episode is for you. ✨ KEY TAKEAWAYS Your money beliefs came from your childhood—not from logic. The way your mom or dad talked about, handled, or stressed about money became YOUR invisible script. You're not making financial decisions based on math; you're making them based on emotions you absorbed decades ago. Until you identify these beliefs, you'll keep repeating the same money patterns.Communication isn't just about talking—it's about knowing what you actually feel first. Most couples struggle because they know something feels "off," but they can't articulate what or why. Before you can communicate effectively with your partner, you need to get clear on what YOU believe, feel, and need. Awareness comes before communication."Doing it for the kids" might be a cop-out. Many parents (especially dads) say they're working long hours and building businesses "for the family," but if you stopped and asked your kids what they actually want, it's probably just YOU—present, available, and not smelling like garlic at 11pm. Check your "why" against your actual family's needs, not against the beliefs you inherited.Arguing in front of your kids is GOOD—if you do it right. Hiding every disagreement teaches kids to avoid conflict entirely, which creates adults who can't handle differing opinions (sound familiar in our current culture?). Healthy arguments teach conflict resolution, emotional regulation, and repair. Fighting (with name-calling, blaming, and yelling) is different—and damaging. Know the difference.You're modeling EVERYTHING, all the time. Your kids are watching how you handle stress, how you react when the plumber is late, how you talk about money, and how you treat your spouse. They're absorbing your emotional regulation (or dysregulation) and will replicate it in their own adult lives. The most powerful parenting tool isn't what you SAY—it's what you DO.Self-compassion is ...
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