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Young men aren’t leaving the church because faith asks too much.
They’re leaving because too often it costs nothing.

In this episode of the Sacred Gentlemen Podcast, we explore what actually happens when a young man walks back into a faith community — and why so many quietly disappear again. He isn’t looking for arguments, programs, or inspiration. He’s watching the men already there.

Young men don’t attach first.
They assess.

They measure belief by posture before words.
By discipline before doctrine.
By whether faith is embodied or merely performed.

Drawing from Scripture, research, and lived observation, this conversation challenges older men to recognize a responsibility we don’t get to opt out of: every man in the room becomes a reference point — whether he wants to or not.

This episode covers:

• Why presence matters more than programs
• Why authority must be embodied before it’s claimed
• Why formation happens through proximity, not advice
• Why the return of young men will not sustain itself without visible, ordered lives
• Why faith that costs nothing is never strong enough to organize a life

This is not a call to perfection.
It’s a call to responsibility.

⏱️ Timestamps

00:00 – A young man standing still in the pew
02:00 – Why young men decide by observation, not theology
03:25 – The question every young man is really asking
05:00 – Responsibility begins before anyone asks for help
06:14 – “Is this real, or is it a performance?”
08:52 – Why men are returning to church (and why many still leave)
11:30 – Attendance does not equal attachment
12:58 – Why young men reject unearned authority
15:48 – Formation requires proximity, not advice
18:00 – The cost of male hesitation and absence
19:02 – What the data actually shows about retention
21:00 – Fathers, faith, and generational inheritance
23:43 – Why programs don’t retain men — men do
26:00 – Why expectation signals seriousness
29:00 – Moses and Joshua: how men are actually formed
33:11 – What obedience looks like right now
36:00 – Presence is leadership. Legacy is built now.

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